Control What You Can: Stop Fighting the Rip Tide

Ever felt completely overwhelmed by stress, only to realize later that half of it was over things you couldn’t control anyway? You’re not alone. A staggering 85% of the things we worry about never actually happen (Leahy, 2005). Yet, we spend an average of 80% of our mental energy focusing on things beyond our control—traffic, other people’s opinions, the weather, global events, or whether that person ever texted back. Meanwhile, the things we can control? They get shoved to the back burner.

Why We Try to Control the Uncontrollable

When we feel powerless, our instinct is to fight for control—but that’s like swimming against a rip tide in the ocean. The harder we struggle against it, the more exhausted and defeated we become. Instead, the smartest move is to stop fighting the current and swim parallel to the shore—finding a safe route where we actually have power.

The truth is, in every situation, we have some level of control. It might not be over the external factors, but we always have control over our perspective, our choices, and our actions.

What You Can Actually Control (Hint: It’s You!)

✅ Your Thoughts – You get to choose how you frame a situation. Is it an obstacle or a challenge? A failure or a lesson? Your mindset shifts everything.

✅ Your Reactions – Other people’s actions? Out of your control. But how you respond? That’s 100% within your power.

✅ Your Choices – You may not control every circumstance, but you always have choices—whether it’s setting boundaries, shifting your focus, or walking away from what no longer serves you.

✅ Your Perspective – Sometimes, changing how we see a situation is the most powerful control we can reclaim.

Taking Back Control = Feeling Fulfilled

When you focus on what you can control, something amazing happens—you stop feeling defeated and exhausted and start feeling empowered and successful.

💡 Want to test this out today?Ask yourself:

🔹 What’s one thing stressing me out right now?

🔹 What part of this do I actually have control over?

🔹 What action can I take to shift my focus to that?

Your power isn’t in changing the world around you—it’s in changing how you navigate it. So today, take control of the one thing that truly belongs to you: YOURSELF

👉 Need help shifting your mindset and reclaiming control? TDT Counseling Services is here to help! Let’s start the journey together.